fashion victims in the pro peleton

For all the new corporate money and “super teams” entering the professional peleton, where did marketing and designers get left out of designing the team kits?  I know I’m not alone in saying this, but frankly it’s embarrassing to the sport.  As cyclists, we all catch the comments from the car-dwellers about lycra, shaved legs, etc. but at least we knew that a properly designed, bold colored kit looked cool.  As Dennis Miller would say “I don’t want to get off on a rant here, but…”

Fashion Victim #1 – Radio Shack.  For as much as I thought the Radio Shack team bike was perhaps the best example of attractive rolling advertisement ever, the kit was a complete flop.  The color split looked like a two-tone Garanimals theme, the dimples in the grey had the cool factor of fake bullet-hole stickers, it just looked bad.  The only hope is that there was such a backlash amongst the online community and Lance has a better connection to that group and will respond. Quick fix – take the red all the way to the top, make the Radio Shack logo bigger, but pull it off toward one side.  Next.

Fashion Victim #2 – Astana.  The new kit looks like it should say “Crayola” instead of Astana across the chest.  White background with swoops of color and Big Primary Red “S” logos everywhere…I don’t think it’s a coincidence that Oscar can’t look straight into the camera.  Also, is Contador using 3x thick chamois or is he just so happy to be King of his team that he can’t control himself?

Fashion Victim #3 – Sky.  It’s somewhat unfortunate because most of the Ciclirati understand that black shorts are better than colored shorts.  And a lot of black can be badass – all due credit to LiveStrong and Mellow Johnny’s for showing how that can be done right.  But the complete absence of design shy of the 80’s Benetton Rugby Stripe is bad.  It’s amateurish – the sort of kit a team I’m qualified to ride for would use because it’s a stock design and it’s “Your Logo Here” on the “semi-custom” webpage.  For a team with color-matched Jaguars, so much more could be done.  If they pull a Cervelo and go to white when it gets hot out, it’ll look even worse.

Fashion Victim #4 – Foot-On/Servetto.  Tan Flesh tone.  At least if they had HTC’s designer, they could have the fake abs look and there would be a possibility of humor in the nightmare.  The flashes of white background/red letter logos scattered around makes it look like some teenager laid out in the sun with an old Oakley sticker to get a tan…except this kid was too dumb to realize the sticker needed a clear background.  Awful in every sense of the word.

There are some kits out there that are good.  BMC’s new kit has a good look.  Saxo does fine; hate or love the Argyle, it’s a good kit; Rabo is still really orange.  I’m not sold on the retro Quick-Step or the Omega-Pharma-Silence-Lotto.

Parting words…Excerpt from Bradley Wiggins Interview

Interviewer : Bradley, tell us about your new team, Sky.

Wiggo : “Someone was playing a joke when they made me, you know, ‘Let’s make this guy a writer and a guitar player, but let’s make him write with his left hand but play with his right, and let’s have him born in the middle of May and give him a Christmas name like Noel, and let’s make him a dodgy, schizophrenic, two-faced Gemini.’ Cheers!”

Interviewer : But you’re not Noel Gallagher.

Wiggo : “If I were in the Beatles, I’d be a good George Harrison.”

Interviewer : Is this some sort of joke…even with that haircut, you’re not a member of Oasis.

Wiggo (upset at this point) : With every song that I write, I compare it to the Beatles. The thing is, they only got there before me. If I’d been born at the same time as John Lennon, I’d have been up there.”


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